Dear Sir,

I am contemplating a Ph. D. project on the new European Standard for "nightsoil". If anyone has any experience in the field of human excrement and the new Fertilisers (Mammalian Body Waste) Regulations I should be most obliged if you would give me a ring (as it were!).

Yours Faithfully,

Fabian Canker, B.Sc.,

Mercia Waste Authority